The First Time [ 2003-08-19, 5:03 a.m. ]

Ok,this is my first entry. How exciting.

I had today off and slept most of it away. Which isnt' surprising since I had no sleep Sunday nite. Gah. I can't seem to sleep like a normal person. And I have to work today. Of course I don't go in till 3:30 so that's ok. I can get a few hours soon, I hope. We'll see.

A slight introduction for myself for all of you out there. I live by myself and I'm a night owl. I have been since I was a kid. I remember staying up all night reading Nancy Drew. I regularly saw the sun come up. So my weirdness started very early.

When I was growing up, my family moved around alot. My dad kept getting promoted and transferred when he worked for Western Union. So I was actually born here in Charlotte but we moved when I was 2. Here's the chronology:

Charlotte till 2 years old

Columbus,GA till almost 3 years old

Columbia,SC till I was 6 years old

Memphis,TN till I was 9 (I think)

Jacksonville,FL till I was 11

Roanoke,VA till I was 17

and then back to where we started.

You think this was hard on me? I have two older sisters who were doing this while they were old enough to care. The move when I was 17 was the hardest.Anyway, we moved back to Charlotte when I was in my senior year of high school. I! But whatever..I adapted. No choice in that. Anyone out there who has had to move alot knows that whatever doesn't kill you, only makes you cry yourself to sleep.

To present day...I live alone and God, do I like that. I've always been a loner. Most night owls are I think. Alot of introspection goes on at that time. Maybe too much. I've been close to depression before so thinking too long and hard isn't always helpfull. But I like reading and watching tv/movies by myself. No interruptions. Plus, going to message boards is a solitary thing. I suppose one of these days I'll live with another person but I haven't lived by myself for that long so not in the near future.

See, I didn't move out of my parents' place till I was 36. That's last June,people. Nothing that you could say about me is worse than what I said about me at the time. There were reasons (money,a feeling of security,liking my parents) that I never made the move before. They'll just sound like excuses. Maybe someday I'll write more about that.

Tomorrow/today I should try to go in a little early to work so I can work on the final drafts for the 5 yearly reviews that I'm writing. The rough drafts I wrote last week were the hard part. I'm a master procrastinator so I ended up doing the first drafts on Friday when they were due the next day. Sheesh.

I'm gonna sign off now. More tomorrow.

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Ryan Adams