[ 2003-09-19, 2:50 a.m. ]

I'm gonna stop freaking out like I did last nite. Really, I am. No, really!

I spoke online last nite with a fellow whighead (a lover of the rock group the Afghan Whigs). She's in Seattle and we ended up conversing for a couple hours or three. I hadn't ever talked with her before so that was cool.

I decided to email another friend whom I hadn't spoken with in ages. Her name is Julia and I had been working with her at the store until last year when she quit to teach art. I had emailed her a couple months or so ago and never heard back from her. I was really getting paranoid. So I decided to email her again. I told her basically to please respond as I was getting insecure. She emailed me back today! I was so happy! Julia said that she would respond to my emails if I would answer my door. She'd come to my apartment on 3 different occassions. Apparantly all 3 times my car had been there. She thought maybe I knew she was there and just didn't want to see her. I emailed back saying that most likely I was sleeping. I'm a nap taker cause of my weird sleeping schedule at nite. Also said it would probably be a good idea to phone me first to wake me the fuck up. It was so nice to hear from her.

She's a fellow REM lover and guess what just came on the digital music channel? REM singing "Don't go back to Rockville". Yay!

When I was talking with my fellow whighead earlier, Kali, I had just finished eating this big bowl of boiled potatoes. I'm a starch freak. It was really stupid because I had eaten spaghetti for dinner at about 7pm. And this was about 11pm. I started feeling sick immediately and ended up throwing everything up. Ugh. ugh ugh. I'm telling you. If that doesn't make me want to go on a diet, nothing will. Just thinking of that the next time I want to gorge myself.

Yesterday at work, I was a bit befuddled. I didn't have our head cashier there to do the recap of the paperwork and I didn't have another manager with me. So with the new way I'm supposed to do my job and all, I got thrown off schedule. I had to do all that paperwork and put tills in the registers and all, and then finally do a walkthrough and whatnot. I wasn't on schedule till about 10am. I told this to Tammy, my boss, when she came in in the afternoon and she understood. She said David, our HC, shouldn't have been scheduled off when a manager is opening solo. I told her I know. We both know that Diane, the other asst.manager, was the one who did that to me so I didn't name names. The scheduling is not Diane's strength. I'm not an ace at it but I don't think I would have done that.

I stayed after work yesterday till after 5:30 to work on the supply order and give it to Tammy to approve. I'll input it when I go in tomorrow. Thusly (is that a word?), I'm going in early tomorrow to do that and work on the action plan for getting it within budget by year end. I'm really supposed to be there at 3:30 but will hopefully be there by 2pm.

Its official. I'm famous. I'm on pamie's blog. She posted on her regular site, about an AIDS walk she was doing and was asking for donations. I donated a small amount and wrote her why. If you can donate just a little bit to that cause you are doing alot.

Note to self: Mail your damn car insurance check. Gah!

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Ryan Adams