Mixing it up [ 2003-11-21, 10:24 p.m. ]

And now I just finished the second cd mix for this month's swap. Here goes:

(Oh, the theme is also songs you are thankful for)

1. Bob Dylan "Like a Rolling Stone"

2. Simply Red "Holding back the years"

3. Syd Straw "Heart of Darkness"

4. INXS "Never Tear Us Apart"

5. the Verve "The Drugs Don't Work"

6. Ryan Adams "Oh my Sweet Carolina"

7. Mary Chapin Carpenter "I am a Town"

8. Travis "Why does it always rain on me?"

9. Neil Young "The Needle and the Damage done"

10. U2 "The Unforgettable Fire"

11. Rufus Wainwright "Poses"

12. Coldplay "Green Eyes"

13. Radiohead "Planet Telex"

14. The Church "Under the Milky Way"

15. Kate Bush "Running Up that Hill"

Whenever I hear "Planet Telex", I get an image of me sitting at the computer with tears running down my face. That whole cd just tears me up but I love it so much. Everything on it is so personal to me, not just the lyrics but the music and everything they remind me of.

I went to work today on an hour and a half of sleep. I could not sleep last night. It was bad. Its not like I slept really late yesterday. And I didn't have that much on my mind. Who knows.

I am so ready for cold weather. I don't like it for too long but I'm ready to wear sweaters. I don't think it really cools down till middle of next week. It only gets chilly at night.

So I close tomorrow night and then I'm off on Sunday. Yay! Oh oh. I forgot to tell ya. I found 11 dollars at work on Tuesday. It was just lying on the floor nowhere around the cash registers. So it didn't belong there. It belonged in my pocket. Hey, if somebody had come up and asked if anyone had found it, I would have forked it over. But hardly anyone ever does that. Somebody lost their PDA or whatever you call it and has never claimed it after a couple months now.

Later. A few hours later and I'm sitting here listening to a copy of the cd I made. And I'm depressing myself. Lately, I've felt so lonely. My friends aren't accessible (outside of work friends). Tanya isn't returning my phone calls. Pretty much I think she's so involved in herself that she can't see me anymore. Just can't see me at all. I don't understand it. Its sad because we were such good friends for so long. And she knows so much about me. And now I'm crying. Crap. When the only thing you have is music to keep you going..well I don't know. Its better than being completely empty. I have my family. I know that's a wonderful thing. But it isn't the same, ya know. Nobody is online. Meaning Angelina from Seattle, fellow Whigs fan. But she hasn't talked to me a in a few weeks either. What the fuck do I do to people to make them turn away?

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