I hate [ 2004-06-29, 4:09 a.m. ]

I don't feel like being upbeat. I don't feel like apologizing to anybody out there because my life isn't as bad as a lot of people's lives are. I know that. This is my life that I'm so-called living. This is what a I hate about it right now.

1. I hate the fact that I hate my job so much right now.

2. I hate that in July I will be working 3 Sundays out of the 4.

3. I hate that we can't seem to get rid of this slack-ass that has been "working" for us for a while.

4. I hate that I don't want to spend the money on new shoes which would help my body not ache so much at the end of the day.

5. I hate that I eat so much.I hate that I spend too much money on that food that I eat too much of.

6. I hate that I was lying in bed and all of sudden started crying thinking of how much I hated my job.

7. I hate that I feel powerless about it.

8. I hate that people's offhand comments can haunt me forever.

9. I hate how lonely I can feel.

10. I hate that I have to be up in 4 hours.

11. I hate that in my personal life I've been a very late bloomer.

12. I hate that I haven't talked to Tanya, a very good friend for a couple of years, since last November.

13. I hate that she hasn't even tried to contact me either. I was the last one to call. Several times leaving messages without any response back. So I gave up.

14. I hate how pathetic my life can be. How stupid and insignificant it is. I know my family loves me. And I still have friends who care. But right now it doesn't seem like enough.

15. I hate that I was able to come up with this much to hate about my life.

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Ryan Adams