Warning to all you people who voted for Bush. Do not read this entry.
Yesterday morning I had stayed up all night. I figured,hey,I may as well go vote. So, I got to my precinct at 7:30am. It seemed like the majority of the people in the long line were Kerry supporters. There was a white cat roaming around the line that was snaking out into the parking lot. The cat was getting pats and scratches from the voters. We decided that it was a good omen.
So I voted after standing in line for over an hour. I felt good. Cautious but hopeful.
I took a nap in the afternoon and then in the evening started watching the returns come in. Then I started to sink deeper and deeper into depression. At one point, I was in the kitchen with the tv turned on. The news people were interviewing some right wing Republican who was newly elected into Congress. The new Congressman was saying how he was going to make sure that abortion was something that was going to be focused upon. At that point I just started sobbing. I felt so far removed from the majority of voters in this country. I live in a red state. And the only bright spot in that is that my county, which is pretty big, voted for Kerry. But when people look at the south right now, all they see is that we voted for Bush.
I really do feel like I need to move up north. I want to be surrounded by like-minded people. As much as Kerry was the majority here in my county, there are still a ton of Bush people.
I was behind a car today on my way to work that had a W. sticker. It really took all of my willpower not to ram it. I'm not kidding. I really had to restrain myself. I feel like I'm going through the 5 stages of grief. And right now its rage/anger, whatever you want to call it. I feel as if I have no real say in this country. I just feel like I want to go up to somebody who voted for Bush and smack them (save for my Repub family). I mean, I won't do it but that's how I feel. But the people I'm really mad at are the people who didn't even bother to vote at all. Just over half of eligible voters voted yesterday. What the fuck? I don't get it. I can see and kind of understand not voting in off year elections. That happens. But for God's sake. For not voting you have no right to complain for the next 4 years. I don't want to hear it out of anybody. Fuckers.
I listened to Kerry's concession speech on the radio on the way to work. This line " I wish I could just wrap you in my arms and embrace each and every one of you individually all across this nation. I thank you from the bottom of my heart." absolutely killed me. I started crying again. I think he really gets how bitter and disappointed people are right now. Its going to take a while to recover from this. I plan to really get involved in something that will be a thorn in Bush's side for the next 4 years. That would be anything that isn't a part of his white bread "values". I hate when people say they voted for someone because he supports "moral values". As if Kerry is the devil.
I think my blood pressure is rising.
I was so upset last night that I couldn't write anything in my NaNoWriMo novel. And I doubt I will tonight. I'll just have to catch up this week.
If ever there was a time to have alcohol in the house now would be the time.
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