Head Case [ 2007-01-08, 5:42 p.m. ]

After having a somewhat okay day to start with yesterday and then it detoriating into me driving home sobbing, I made the complete and final decision to make an appt. with a psychiatrist. I obviously need counseling and meds. I can't handle stress well. I don't handle any slight little criticism well. I take everything to heart and any slight can make me think of myself as an awful person who only disppoints people and myself. I can't take that anymore. I called my insurance today to see what kind of coverage I get and it's decent. Once I meet my annual $200 deductible then I only pay for 10% of the cost and there's no co-pay. So, I don't have to worry about the money aspect. It was too late (past 5pm) to call for an appt. at the doctor I chose from my list of participating physicians but I'll call tomorrow and probably make an appt. for a couple weeks or so from now. Just knowing that I'm actually taking this step is good. Maybe once I am probably on medication then I can actually feel some kind of motivation in my life to do something. Instead of this, "if I ignore it then it will go away or it doesn't exist at all" attitude.

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