Always should be someone you really love.... [ 2007-02-11, 1:04 a.m. ]

Ow. My feet hurt. I decided to wear my boots to work today. They have about an inch and a half chunky heel. And I wear those boots all the time when I go out to dance or the bar or to concerts. But for work...I think I'll try them with some kind of inserts because by the evening time, my feet were yellin' at me.

I wanted to wear them because of my short stubby legs. That's the only reason I would wear heels at all. I look so much better in heels but my feet hate wearing them. Since I have bunions on both feet and just plain fucked up feet anyway, it's a bit of a challenge. But because my boy was working today, I kind of wanted to look nice. Ah, vanity! I took the opportunity to go and chat with him on the ruse of looking for something. He is so damnn cute. You have no idea. I had a dream about him last night. Nothing dirty, mind you. But still. My favorite thing about this crush is that it totally gives me a reason to make myself look nice for work. I think he's completely clueless to my obsession which is ok. I don't think he minds talking with me but I need to make him talk about himself more. Boys! What a puzzle.

Drugs are working ok so far. I think the P@xil will take a week or so to kick in but I am feeling ok anyway. I guess it's relief that I'm trying something. And I've taken the R0zerem and boy, does it work. It doesn't really sedate you but it lets me drift off to sleep and keeps me there instead of that restlessness that makes it hard to get a good night's sleep.

Two bands that I've been grooving to the last few days are Sloan and The Little Ones. You totally need to get them.

And speaking of music, my article for the 'zine, besides the Pete Yorn preview and the "If I was Queen of the city's music scene", will be about the women of rock in honor of Women's History Month in March. I emailed to let them know that was what I was going to do and Alison wrote back all excited and saying she can't wait to read it. I can't wait to read it either. Sigh. It will get done. But I hate research or thinking about it. Like the sword of Damacles. Sheesh. I'll need to have all this done by the end of the week, I think. Oh, crap. I know what I'm doing on my days off.

But it's all good. I love it anyway. I love that my job is about music. My non-paying job is about music. My hobbies are all music-related (going to concerts, buying cds, karaoke, dancing). It's pretty good stuff.

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Ryan Adams