Close to me [ 2007-03-07, 12:05 a.m. ]

Ok, with a few bills to pay, the joining of Curves will have to wait. BUT I did go buy some cool walking shoes. First I went to Lady F00t L0cker. Cute Pum@s but didn't have them in a wide width (I have challenging feet) so I wandered over to the Finish Lin-e and got ignored plus I didn't see anything really that I wanted. (I was doing this on my lunch break) So then I went to E@sy Spirit, where I've bought shoes before and wear them every day at work. They had some really cute slip-on walking shoes in black with suede accents. So I bought those and because I work at the mall I got a 10% discount! Score!

So I've made a plan to start walking every day around the neighborhood. I'd like to try for 2 miles at first. I will have to put together a walking playlist on my iPod!!

The weird thing about losing weight is that I still eat sometimes. But other times I have no real appetite. Like today, at around noon I was a little light-headed from low blood sugar. So after I came back from shopping I got a coffee and one of those huge shortbread sugar cookies at the cafe. I drank the coffee and about half of the cookie. No appetite but I knew I needed something. Other times I will actually crave food, maybe overdo it but still it usually isn't as bad as I used to be. I know my P@xil can affect my appetite but honestly, I don't think it's the side effects from it. But it's because it makes me feel better and less inclined to need food to medicate myself.

Anyways, I'm starting to think that the boy at work is beginning to flirt with me. Nothing over the top but things like looking at a book and standing right NEXT to me with his face just inches from mine. I'm a little light-headed thinking about it. Also, I make him laugh. And he carries on the conversation even while I'm chattering away. I do tend to chatter when I'm around him. Heh. Today there was one point where he was making some snarky comment and said to Roxy,rec'ving mgr, "Is there anything else I can do for you?" and then he asked me and I just muttered under my breath to Rox "Well, there is something" making Rox snort with laughter which made Jon ask "What?". We replied "Nothing!" and I told Rox "Shut up" while I was laughing.

And the rich fantasy life I have about him..damn. Tingly, light-headed and breathing hard. I was thinking about him earlier and just had an overpowering physical reaction to my thoughts. Which, while not X-rated, were enough to increase my blood pressure.

Anyways, tomorrow is my day off and I will be going to the psychiatrist at 3pm. See you laters.

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Ryan Adams