Who's gonna fall at the foot of thee? [ 2010-05-15, 5:41 p.m. ]

This is an email I sent Brooks 3 hours ago. I still haven't heard back from him. Maybe he hasn't checked email. Maybe he's at work. I won't panic till tomorrow. One thing is that he still only has his phone not a computer. But I know he can check email. It's a Palm Pre or something like that. Wow. I just made a lot of excuses for him. Ok. Here's the email:

This is one of the emails that I really didn't want to write. But I'm making myself do it since I don't like being in limbo.

I feel like for at least 2 to 3 weeks now that you are avoiding talking much to me. Please don't get defensive. Maybe I'm just reading things wrong but just look at it from my end. I don't know what's going on in your life because you don't tell me that much. So, if you're at work, I understand. But sometimes I'll message and get nothing in return. At all. Again, maybe I'm reading it wrong. Just tell me so. But frankly on my side of things it feels like I'm getting the "fade out". Which makes me feel rejected, naturally enough, but also humiliated since I sent you pictures.

If you're giving me the fade out...then frankly I don't want to know why. My self-esteem is low enough as it is. Just don't reply at all to this email and I'll get the message. If that isn't the case then please reply and tell me you're still interested in me. That's all I need. Some consideration. Give & take.

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Ryan Adams