oh well [ 2007-05-02, 5:41 p.m. ]

Well, all this angst has become a moot point now. I had a brilliant idea this morning at work that I wasn't positively sure that he didn't have a girlfriend. So, I got a lady that I've worked with before at my other store, Nancy, to do recon for me. She's around 60 and I can trust her to get the info for me. So she went back there shortly after talking to me. My music seller,Mike, came in at 11am and Nancy walked by just then and said "I don't think it was the answer you wanted". I just smiled and said "That's what I figured!". I tried to act all ok and talked to Mike about things while I felt like I was having an out of body experience. My mind was trying to decide how to handle this info. While I'm disappointed, I'm actually ok. And glad that I found out before I asked him out. As it is now, I almost feel more at ease now around him and he jokes and talks with me more than most apparantly because the other ladies on the staff comment about how quiet he is. While he was kind of grumpy last week, this week he's been quite easy to chat with.

So, I'll still flirt and just let him know that I'm still interested (hey, girlfriends don't equal married!). Either way, he's fun to hang around (and easy on the eyes) and I could still ask him to come out with a group of us when we go out. No harm in that! Thanks for all of your encouragement all this time. Tonight I plan on going to the karaoke bar where some friends from my old store will meet up with me. Drinking and flirting with the guys at the bar and laughing with my old co-workers sounds like a good antidote for any pain I might still have.

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Ryan Adams