Fade into you...strange you never knew [ 2007-08-16, 1:42 a.m. ]

Well, I hate to disappoint any of you that thought you might hear juicy details tonight about myself and S. But I think you knew down deep that there wouldn't be any after last night's entry. Truly. I can look and maybe flirt with other guys. But that's it. I don't want anyone else.

I almost wish I did. But at the same time, it has really been so very long since I've really been in love that I kinda like this feeling in some perverse way. But I am proud of myself today that I didn't text him until after midnight which means I had gone 24 hours w/o texting him. The only thing I texted tonight was "Phil Rizzuto is still dead". This goes back to last night when the tv at the bar (with the sound down) was on ESPN and they kept running the report over and over again about Rizzuto dying. Which prompted Jim to lean over and say "Hey,that guy is still dead". He being one who doesn't follow baseball hardly at all had no idea who PR was.

Drrrr....I have to go to work at 8am tomorrow. I do have plans for tomorrow night with my friend,Kerry,whom I rarely see. She messaged me on Facebook and asked if I wanted to go with her to a preview of Superbad. It should be funny. Though my only beef with this (and it isn't really Judd Apatow or Seth Rogen's fault at all) wave of "ordinary" looking guys being in these silly comedies is that it's a double standard once again. You never see out of shape/chubby/"handsome" girls as the leads in these movies where they are hunting down guys to lose their own virginity. Just ain't gonna happen, is it?

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Ryan Adams